Monday, September 13, 2010

one step at a time {learning to let go}

My little boy is just growing up so fast.  I can't believe that he's come so far in just such a short amount of time.  It's so crazy how they go from being completely dependent on you for every single thing {and still is for the most part} but little by little we have to learn to let go.  I guess this is what being a mommy is all about.  Little by little watching your child grow up, teaching him so he can learn to do things for himself.  I love watching when Lincoln makes a new discovery.  You can just tell in his eyes that he is so proud of what he just figured out how to do!  Our newest "step" is learning to walk.  Now don't go getting too excited here, he can't walk on his own just yet but he's getting soooo close.  He has mastered the walking with just one hand and lately he's been "accidentally" walking.  It's like he forgets what he's doing and will almost run to Tyler or I but when we try to repeat it he just sits down....little stinker! :)  

Lincoln and I are both learning how to "let go."  He's trying to walk on his own with no assistance from me and I'm trying to "let go" and let him do it on his own.  We both have to let go for him to be successful.  As moms we need to know the right timing to let go.  Throughout his whole life I'll be trying to figure out how to and when to "let go" of certain things.  

I learned very early on in Lincoln's life that I have to let go of him completely.  He is not mine but God's.  I've just been given the privilege to raise him but ultimately he is God's alone.  I had to learn that pretty quickly.  About week 24 of my pregnancy to be exact.  I had to "let go" of my worries and fears for him and let God be the strength for both of us.  I had to "let go" of my own ability to take care of him and grow him and let God perform his miracle.  I had to "let go" my plan for this pregnancy and my plan for this little boy's life and let God unfold His perfect plan for Lincoln.

As Lincoln learns to take his first steps I am constantly reminded of God's power.  There is no explanation for this little boy to be here and to be doing the things that he's doing except that this was all God.  These steps remind me of what a miracle I witnessed. 

I just love that boy so much.

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