30 Weeks and a Baby Shower

30 Weeks!


The amazing girls who put together our shower!!!
Orrin is the cutest! He knew exactly what to do with the camera!



Love of my life!
The best cake ever!


This week marked 30 weeks for us! I felt like it was a huge milestone to get out of the twenties! Since I'm posting this late in the week, we now only have 3 1/2 weeks left! It's all down hill from here! The exact day that we're shooting to get to is July 23rd. There is no C-Section scheduled yet but it'll probably be around the 23rd. Lincoln is still breech so we're planning on a C-Section.

Yesterday (Sunday) some of the girls I am in Bible Study with, put together a baby shower for us. The hospital let us use the Conference Room so everybody didn't have to pack into my room! haha, that would've been quite interesting! I've been looking forward to this so much and had SO much fun! It was great to actually do something "normal" and not feel like I'm a prisoner at the hospital for a couple hours. I got to wear actual maternity clothes and didn't have to stay in my wheelchair! Whoohoo! We were so blessed by everyone who came. We were showered with so many neat gifts and are so thankful for everything! Now I can't wait to be able to use everything once Lincoln is born!

I was so tired after only 2 hours and slept soundly last night! I also just woke up from a wonderful nap this afternoon. Boy am I going to be in for the shock of my life once Lincoln's born and I'm going to have to get back to my normal life. Now don't get me wrong, I'm SO ready to get out of here and be back at home but my body is going to be so out of shape it's going to be ridiculous! Even walking the halls is going to leave me huffing and puffing since I haven't walked more than the length of my room in almost 7 weeks!

God's Obviously Trying to Teach Me Something

Today during my quiet time I was reading through the flipbook that my mom had made for each of us kids a year or so ago and one entry really stood out to me.

-Nothing will ever happen to you that God does not already know about.
Psalm 139: 1-4 "O Lord, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O Lord.

-Nothing will ever happen to you that is a mistake.
Psalm 139: 4, 16 "Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O Lord....All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be."

-Nothing will ever happen that you cannot handle by God's power and grace.
2 Corinthians 12: 9-10 "Be he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

-Nothing will ever happen to you that will not eventually be used by God for some good purpose in your life.
Romans 8:28 "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

-Nothing will ever happen to you without God's presence.
Matthew 28:20 "...And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age."

God produces fruit by putting us in opposite situations
ex. Love - people who are hard to love
Peace - Middle of a storm

Similar Situations

Yesterday was another typical day for me. Nothing out of the ordinary, just the nurses taking my vitals every so often and running a non stress test on Lincoln's heart rate. I watched a couple episodes of Alias and finished the 4th Twilight book. Then one of my nurses came in and said that there was another woman here with a similar situation to mine. She was just admitted two days ago and had heard about me and wanted to talk with me! I was really excited to meet someone else who is going through the same thing. I went and met her and as we were talking I learned just how hard her situation has been. She started bleeding early on in her pregnancy and her water actually broke at 16 weeks. She has been on bed rest at home for 8 weeks now and once she got to 24 weeks they admitted her to the hospital. Now she's starting back where I first started but has already been through SO much! All things considered she seemed to be in good spirits. So if you think of it, you can be praying for her situation. I'm sure we'll get together pretty often since neither of us have anything better to do! I don't want to look back on this whole experience and wish I had done more with it, I want to use it to the full capacity that God wants me to. I pray that my eyes would be open to opportunities to share him with the staff that I've gotten to know so well! :)

One example I want to share about how just living your life can be such a huge witness to others. My doctor has often walked in to see me (she comes everyday to check in on me) when there have been a lot of people here. It's very rare that she'll come and there isn't a party going on! haha. The other morning she came and was commenting on how well I've been doing and was so impressed by the support I've had from so many people. She asked how I knew these friends, if they were from college, etc. I told her that we knew most of our friends from church and bible studies. She was so impressed by the community that we have and I just want to say again that I'm am SOOO thankful for such an awesome community! We have been so blessed to have so many caring friends and family to support us during this time. I honestly don't know if I would've made it this far without so many people encouraging me and helping us along the way!

Half Way Through This Marathon!

29 Weeks!
Hanging out at our new, but temporary, home
The guys
Us girls, we like to cuddle! :)
Thursday marked my half way mark! It's hard to believe I've been here 5+ weeks now. It's just hard for me to even comprehend the fact that I haven't been farther away from this hospital than the sidewalk outside of it and haven't walked more than just around my little room for THAT long! My hips remind me everyday, though, that I just NEED to walk! I've never wanted to just walk around so badly before. But I know that it's in my and Lincoln's best interest to just stay put for now. I'll have plenty of time to walk around after he's born.

We had a pretty busy weekend. Friday night was really nice because Tyler and I had the evening to ourselves (not that we don't want visitors, that's not it at all, we just need so "us" time every so often). It was so good to be able to really catch up because I feel like we never see each other (even though he's here every evening). In some ways this whole situation has been quite the strain on our relationship but in other ways we're so much closer now and have connected in a way that we never have before.

Saturday was a really fun day. Jon and Charlene came down from NE for a short visit and Kaely, Chad, Daniel and Ashley joined us for a relaxing evening with pizza, hummus, DQ, playing Apples to Apples and watching Transformers. It was so great to have a somewhat "normal" evening. Pictures from above are from that evening.

Also that night, my crazy parents decided to leave after my mom got off of work at 9pm to drive down here really quick. They got in about 2:30am and did some painting in Lincoln's room on Sunday. They came up and hung out with me for awhile and then left Sunday evening to go back.

Then Sunday evening Hope came back from spending a weekend in Lincoln with Derek, and brought Kelsey with her! Kelsey is staying this week with us. It'll be so fun having her here, hopefully we don't bore her too much with our obviously "exciting" life right now! haha.

Today I had my weekly Biophysical Profile done and Lincoln did great again scoring 6 out of 8! I have less fluid this week, which is discouraging but nothing I can really do about that. The NST was also really good today, my nurse informed me afterward that it showed I had a couple of contractions, neither of which I felt. Hopefully those will stay away and we can make it 4 1/2 more weeks! The sonogram showed that Lincoln is still breech (surprise, surprise) and that he weighs approximately 2 lbs 8oz.

Last night I guess I must be getting bored with the everyday routine and wanted to make things interesting. My blood pressure has been creeping up but only at nights and last night it was really high and I started seeing stars and was getting a little dizzy. The laborist on call ordered bloodwork done in order to figure out if I was showing signs of preeclampsia or if it's just pregnancy hypertension. The bloodwork came back fine so right now I've apparently got hypertension. So they are monitoring my blood pressure a lot more often now. Pray that either it doesn't get any worse or that my blood pressure would go back to normal. The last thing we need is for it to get so bad that they have to deliver Lincoln just because of how much body is reacting!

Well I think that's all I've got for now! We'll just keep pressing on!

Happy Father's Day!

I just wanted to say that I'm so thankful for my dad and everything he has taught me over the years. I couldn't have asked for a better dad! I love you dad!

This year for Tyler, since I couldn't go out and buy him a card I wrote this out on a sheet of paper for him. I wish I could say that I wrote this myself but I'm not that talented :( It's a letter to Daddy from Lincoln.

Daddy
I love it when I hear your voice whispering to me outside of mommy's belly telling me that you love me and to treat mommy good. Your prayers for me are definitely heard by my little ears but more importantly by God's big ears.
I love it when you rub mommy's belly with you hand to try and feel me move. These same hands are going to teach me how to throw a football and shoot basketballs. They will be the same hands that shake my hand on my wedding day.
I love it when you give mommy a hug because I am right in the middle and feel the warmth of your love too.
I am going to love it when I finally get to feel the warmth of your arms holding me for the first time after I am born!
I love you daddy! Happy Father's Day!
Love,
Lincoln

A couple quotes/verses that I'm leaning on right now

"You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand." John 13:7

"The Lord measures our strength and then puts us where we'll need just a little more...a place that may be hard for us at times - but not hard for Him." (I don't know who said this!)

"Anything that makes us need God is a blessing." Nancy Lee Demoss

"If dependency on God is the objective, then weakness is an advantage." Alistair Begg

Thanks to those of you who have shared these with me!

Another Day in My New Life

So today is day 35 here in the hospital and last night we were able to attend our third out of four childbirth preparation classes. The nurses were teasing me as we stopped by the nurses station on our way down to the third floor for the class (Tyler needed to drop of his stash of food in the small fridge which by now is basically ours considering how often Tyler and Hope use it!) they were saying that by now I should know everything and could give the tours here to our classmates! It was also funny because out of the 7-9 nurses there I knew all but maybe 1 or 2!! You know you've been at the hospital for a long time when you are saying hi to all the nurses, hospitality workers or ultrasound tech's in the hallway as you pass them by! Even when I leave the 4th floor for sonograms or just to go for a "wheelchair walk" there is always someone who recognizes me. The staff here is so nice and I've already grown so attached to some of them! They all keep telling me day in and day out that they're all rooting for me and Lincoln! It's so encouraging to have that kind of support.

Tomorrow I will be 29 weeks! It's so exciting to check another week off and keep gaining ground. That means my water broke 5 weeks ago tomorrow morning. It's so crazy how our lives can change in a split second like ours did.

Right now I'm passing my time watching episodes of ALIAS (basically non-stop now because I'm hooked on them!) knitting a blanket for Lincoln (yes I do know how to knit, I just haven't done it in a long time!) reading the last book of Twilight, checking email and facebook, journaling, looking for items online such as cribs, strollers, carseats etc. and when it's cool enough outside I'll take a wheelchair ride around the outside of the building or just sit at the entrance and have people look at me like, "What is she doing sitting in the hospital wheelchair? She doesn't even look like a patient!"

Well that's about all I've got for now, keep praying for reactive NST's daily, no infections, that Lincoln passes his weekly BPP's, and for enough fluid for Lincoln's lungs to develop properly. We appreciate everyone praying for us. God is so good!

What a Little Stud!

Our little guy is such a stud just like his awesome daddy! Tyler has been an amazing support for me during this time and is doing so much to help make this easier in any way he can! I can't express just how much I love this man and how grateful I am that Lincoln is going to have a daddy like Tyler!
28 Weeks

I had another biophysical profile done today, which was actually the best sonogram I've had yet just because the technician was so nice and explained everything without me even asking questions. Lincoln is just such a fighter already, he passed with flying colors this morning and got 6 out of 8 on the test!!!!! The action that he didn't pass on Friday was breathing movements and he did that today! They also measured more amniotic fluid than on Friday. Today I had around 3 cm instead of 0.9cm on Friday! I am so proud of that little guy! He is still breech with his butt down and folded in half like a pancake with his head up by my belly button and his legs straight up next to his face. The chances of him turning are pretty little since he doesn't have much fluid to float around in so we're just planning on having a c-section unless he surprises us and does a complete 180.

Yesterday marked my one month anniversary of being in here! We've come so far since my water broke at 24 weeks, it's incredible! The Neonatologist is going to meet with me sometime in the next day or so and talk about what I can expect now if he was born instead of a month ago. It'll be interesting to hear what she has to say. I just know that Lincoln is one tough little guy to be doing as well as he is with no fluid! "Why do this the easy way when I can show everyone what a stud I am!" :)

Neighborhood Gossip

I had been wondering lately what our neighbors were thinking about me being gone for almost a month now or if they had even noticed. Well apparently at least one of them has. Tyler was at home doing a little bit of yard work to stay on top of things and our neighbor to the East was outside talking to him. She asked how we were doing and Tyler proceeded to tell her that I was pregnant (we hadn't had the chance to tell any of our neighbors yet) and that I was in the hospital and had been here for awhile. Her response was "ohhhh, I've seen you come and go but hadn't see her in a long time." Tyler also went on to say that my sister had moved in with us for the summer and our neighbor said, "ahhh, that explains things!"
So in other words, our neighbor must have thought that Tyler and I split up (since I was gone) and that he had a new girlfriend (Hope)! I guess for someone who had no idea what was going on, I can see where she might get an idea like that. I bet that we're the talk of the neighborhood, people trying to figure out where I disappeared to! They'll sure be surprised when I finally show up with a baby! :)

Good News

Well the BPP was done this morning bright and early at 5am. They came to our room and just did it in here so that was nice. We watched the whole time and it was nice because the sonogram tech was very friendly and told us everything she was seeing. Lincoln scored a 4 out of 8 (his goal was 6) the part he didn't pass on was the breathing movements but I was reassured by both doctors that the test was only 30 minutes long and since he's so young he could've shown diaphram movement the minute they stopped the test or after 45 minutes. There just is no way to tell. But my amniotic fluid level was higher then they measured yesterday (over 2cm) and Lincoln had a full bladder so that shows that he is continuing to make fluid. Neither of my doctors were worried and Dr. Mroz was very reassured by the test (even though he technically failed). So we won't be meeting this little guy today at least! We'll do another BPP test Monday morning to see how he does then as well. So keep praying that everything is okay and I'll continue keeping everyone updated! Praise Jesus for a little more time in the incubator! :)

Please Pray

I had another sonogram today to get all of Lincoln's measurements and see where my fluid level was. That was this morning and the sonogram tech was able to tell me right away that my fluid level had dropped again (surprise, surprise) to 1 cm from 3.8cm. I expected that and then she said that Lincoln weighed approximately 2 lbs 5 oz. I learned later tonight that he is measuring at 27 weeks instead of 28 weeks. They aren't sure if that is a mistake and that because of the lack of fluid they are measuring wrong or if he just isn't growing like he should be. So to determine which, they are going to do a biophysical profile test tomorrow morning. It's a score out of 8 and they measure 4 things like tone, amount of fluid and two others that I can't remember now. We already know that he will fail the amniotic fluid portion so they are wanting him to score a 6 out of 8. If he scores 6 out of 8 they they will say it's because of measurement error and they he's probably doing fine and growing normally. If he gets less than 6 then Lincoln will probably be coming out sometime within the next day or so. I know God is completely in control and none of this is taking Him by surprise. Please pray that Lincoln is doing just fine and that they can keep him in here much longer. I will have the test done in the morning, and as my doctor explained it's basically just like a glorified sonogram. I should find out the results fairly soon afterwards then and we'll go from there. I'm clinging to this saying right now,

The Lord measures our strength and then puts us where we'll need just a little more...a place that may be hard for us at times - but NOT hard for Him.

Random Happenings

Well today is my 27th day here in the hospital. (Not like I'm counting the days or anything)

Yesterday was nice enough that I was able to sit outside the front doors of the hospital for almost 2 hours (over my 90 minute limit, oops!) and just sit in my wheelchair and read. I also had some fun people watching. I saw three families go home with their newborn babies, that was really hard but I know my time is coming, it'll just take a little longer and much more waiting and patience than those moms probably had to go through. It was kind of funny though because I guess I didn't look like a patient and one of the hospitality workers came up and asked if I was waiting to get picked up and I told her I wasn't because I had to stay until I have my baby. I continued to tell her what happened and how long I've been here. She apologized for thinking I was leaving or just someone who saw a wheelchair sitting out there and decided to sit and use it! She's like, "I was going to have to ask you to get up because the wheelchair is hospital property." I guess from where she was standing she couldn't see my hospital bracelet and since I was wearing normal clothes I can see where she might be a little confused. It was so nice though to be outside for THAT long!

Tonight is our second Childbirth Preparation Class. I'm excited because that means I've been here another week! Now hopefully I can make it to all 4 of the classes.

A friend of ours came to visit yesterday and gave me the devotional "Streams in the Desert." I've heard of it but never read through it. I started it yesterday and the devotion for the day was just so perfect for what we're going through right now I wanted to share it.

"If a person allows it, he can find something at every turn of the road that will rob him of his victory and his peace of ind. Satan is far from retiring from his work of attempting to deceive and destroy God's children. At each milestone in your life, it is wise to check the temperature of your experience in order to be keenly aware of the surrounding conditions.
If you will do this and firmly exhibit your faith at the precise moment, you can sometimes actually snatch victory from the very jaws of defeat.
Faith can change any situation, no matter how dark or difficult. Lifting your heart to God in a moment of genuine faith in Him can quickly alter your circumstances.
God is still on His throne, and He can turn defeat into victory in a split second, if we will only trust Him. "

"God is mighty! He is able to deliver;
Faith can victor be in every trying hour;
Fear and care and sin and sorrow be defeated
By our faith in God's almighty, conquering power.

Have faith in God, the sun will shine,
Though dark the clouds may be today;
He heart has planned your path and mine,
Have faith in God, have faith alway."

27 Weeks

Hope's makeshift birthday party.
Hope, me, Kaely and Ashley hanging out on Friday night
Kaely's earring got catch on a thread of string from one of my hospital pillows
My amazing sister and I on her birthday!
Yay for Ice Cream Cake from Dairy Queen! :)
27 Weeks
So I'm really bad at posting my weekly picture on the actual day that I turn the next week but at least it's still in the same week! That has to count for something, right? In my own defense this has been a pretty busy weekend....yes my time can actually get filled up even being stuck in the hospital! Hope's 21st birthday was Friday and so we all celebrated with her (as much as is possible in a little hospital bedroom!)
And then on Saturday until today my friends Shannon and Kelly drove down from Nebraska to spend some time with me. It was great to have people around all weekend and catch up with those girls! It really blesses me when I know people are giving up time that they could be doing something else and come visit me. It's been so humbling to see all the outpouring of love and encouragement from all our family and friends during this time. This is going to be such a long road and honestly I figured by this point most people would have "forgotten" about us and gone on with their lives but I have still had an average of at least 2-3 visitors (outside of Tyler and Hope) every single day! It really makes me so thankful for our amazing community and friends we have here. I know my mom has said that it blesses her to see that since she wishes she could just pop in every day and see how I'm doing but obviously can't because she's so far away. I'm really so thankful for each person that has come to see me, you have no idea how much impact on my day, even a quick visit or phone call makes to me. All of you are what helps me keep my positive attitude and not to focus on the "what ifs." I just want you all to know how thankful I am for each of you and everything you've done for me!

7 More Weeks To Go!

Well tomorrow I will officially be 27 weeks along! Yay! Today marks day 21 here at St. Joe and surprisingly enough I can't believe it's already been 3 weeks! Of course it's been long and hard but honestly 3 weeks ago I didn't think I'd still be here. I'm so thankful though that just like the picture above reminds me everyday that God has everything under control! He already knows the plans he has for little Lincoln and just how long (down to the hour, minutes and seconds) Lincoln will stay inside me! It'll all happen in His perfect timing and not a minute sooner. Even though this whole thing has caught Tyler and I off guard, it didn't catch God off guard and that is so reassuring to think about! My brother painted the sign above and brought it down with him last weekend when he and my mom were here. I knew he was talented in singing, playing guitar and writing music but I had no idea he could paint like this! Needless to say I was VERY impressed! This is the preemie onsie that Hope got for Lincoln the other day. I have it hanging in my room because, I don't know if you can read it from the picture, but it says "Worth the wait...." with a cute little snail on it! It's so true. Lincoln is definately worth the wait and I will happily wait in for him because the longer he takes to make his appearance, the better off he will be once he's born. I look at this tiny onsie and can't believe a baby can be this small.

The only update right now is that I might get to move to a bigger room with a double bed instead of this twin hospital bed! My nurse said it was occupied at the moment but figured in the next couple days I would be able to move....that would be really nice and then whether Hope or Tyler are staying with me, they would have a more comfortable place to sleep.

Wednesday May 13th (the day before my water broke) I had called and signed up for a Birth Preparation Class here at St. Joseph. Well since the class is just a floor below me my Doctor approved for me to go. So our first class was last night from 7-9pm. Tyler rolled me down in my wheel chair (which didn't cause everyone to look at me and wonder what in the world was wrong with me!). Last night was mostly just about information so I was able to do almost everything. I didn't exactly know what to expect and a lot of the information wasn't new to me (I've had lots of time to read and do my own research! haha) but I'd be lying if I didn't say, it was kind of hard for me to sit in the back the look at all the happy moms-to-be with their bulging bellies and be jealous that they get to be at home, have their baby showers, and their babies have all the fluid they need to develop completely. We have three weeks of the class left and hopefully we will be able to attend all of them!

Well that's all I've got for now, I think I'll have another sonogram either later this week or beginning of next week and I'll find a way to get those pictures on here to show off our little guy!

Feeding the Forgotten

Today has been one of those harder days for me. It's been hard in different ways than my other "harder" days. Those have usually been because I'm feeling sorry for myself and just lonely being stuck here in the hospital. Today was different because until now I've been able to feel comfort in the fact that I still had a lot of fluid but after learning last week that I didn't have very much left and the problem it can present in the development in Lincoln's lungs, the worries of that have started to consume my thoughts all day. And unless I make myself do something "productive" here in my room, that's all I do is think about and focus on the "what if's." So while I was reading my friend, Kendra's, blog I came across her latest post about "Feeding the Forgotten." I clicked the link and read about these families in Uganda, that are trapping termites and eating dung to survive. I decided to give towards this and it helped me to feel like I was still able to "do" something and just put into perspective how lucky I am. My child already has so much more available to him to help him survive and do well after he's born and these children can't even find food to eat. I also think about my own selfish longings of what I want to be doing right now and realize I'm still getting food to eat, I'm safe and taken care of, my baby is safe and is getting great care and these children don't know where their next meal is coming from or where they might sleep at night. We take so much we have for granted and don't realize what we've got until it's gone or taken away from us. It's so hard not to take things for granted because I get so caught up in everyday life but it's something I really want to strive for.

Please consider clicking on the picture above and just reading about how you can give. 1 meal only costs $0.14. I know we're all stretched for money right now but each dollar will go so far for these kids!